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lobelia321FICLET: "Imbibing Pharmaceuticals"
SERIES: Nr. 10 of the Boring!Orli storyverse. Nr 9 is here.
Author: Lobelia; lobelia40@yahoo.com
Pairing: Orlando Bloom
Warning: The unboring of boring!Orli.
Summary: But is it permanent?
A/N: This installment is for![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
natasha1805 for hanging on in there and for forging ahead and for never being boring.
-----
Orli stepped over the black-and-white landscape of salt on the cork tiles of his kitchen floor, the sand plains of gritty grains, the deltas and rivulets of Johnny's sweat leaf-textured into the expanse of granules, the smudged handprints and spray of stray chloridical molecules extending into the hallway and along the flight path of Johnny's recent exit.
In the living room, Orli picked up the phone.
"Hello?"
"Hi, Orlando, it's Viggo here. I'm at the airport."
"Oh dear," said Orli. "I'm so sorry. I completely forgot."
"You forgot?"
"I am really so sorry. I meant to leave a message with you but I couldn't pick you up today because I had the gas man coming. And I had some dealings with the police which got me distracted. Also, Johnny was here."
"Johnny?"
"Yes, Johnny Depp. Actually, he was behaving in a very extreme way. I'll tell you about it. Can you get a taxi here?"
"Sure. Sure I can. See you in a bit."
Orli hung up. He picked up the receiver again to check for any voicemail messages. "You have four messages."
"Oh, hi, Orli. Not there, are you? If you're there, pick up. Hello? Orli? Anyway, it's Dom. The police just rang. They want us to go over there, to the station, you know the one on the corner of Huston and Problem, we were there the other day, you know when that woman came by with the tape. Anyway, what was I saying? Oh yes, they have some new lead or clue or something and want us to go over there. They'll probably ring you in a minute, too. Also, I bought a new record. It's totally cool, it's an old 45 rpm, the first recording, the pre-release one. It's 'Pterodactyl Shoeshine' by The Shag, the 1973 version. I got it in the original sleeve, too, only a tiny bit scuffed and some water damage on the top right hand corner, otherwise mint condition. Hang on, I'll put it on and you can listen to it..." Rustle, shuffle, ping, pong, peng, muffle, hiss, rustle, crinkle, crisple. "I am sorry. This message has now exceeded the allotted message storage time. Beeeep."
"Good afternoon, Mr Bloom. This is Inspector Sergeant Detroit. We met the other day. I'm afraid we'll need you to come down to the station again this afternoon. There have been new developments. Please be there as soon as you can."
"This is Person-to-Person Delivery Service. It's about the delivery you're expecting this afternoon, Mr... er... Floom. It's going to be about seven hours late. Please ring the office if you have any other queries."
"This is Jacksonpete Medical Practice. I'm afraid there's been a mistake. Dr Craigmarton handed you the wrong prescription when you were in here the other day. You were given the vaginal anti-fungal cream. Please contact the surgery as a matter of urgency and discontinue the medicine at once. The ointment you were given may have confusing hormonal consequences."
Thump, thump, thump.
Orli frowned. His electronic organiser was next-door, on his bedside table. He put the phone in the crook of his chin, pulled a notepad (placed near the phone for just such an exigency) towards himself, slipped the pencil tucked into the notepad's spiral-bound spine out and scribbled on the top page of the pad: 'Police. Dom. Surgery, ring now. Delivery late. Viggo.'
Thump, thump, thump.
"Yes, just one minute!"
The person thumping on the door was Johnny. Orli nearly fell over him because as it turned out, Johnny was prone on the doormat, pressed flat against the bottom half of the paneling, thumping against the wood with his flat hands and against Orli's shins once the door had opened.
"Johnny."
"Oh, Orli-mate." Johnny crawled in and sat up against the hallway wall. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry I messed up your floor. I'll clean it all up. Just give me a rag or something. It's not your fault that I'm in this state. I must tell you... I should have told you this a long time ago but it's not just... a sudden thing, as you so wisely said. And it's not just a lust thing, either, although it's that as well. Shit, I hardly know what I'm saying, I'm in a real mess here."
Orli knelt down next to Johnny.
"Orli-mate, you're so fucking... I'm sorry I said that about being repressed. It's me who's repressed, all these months I've been repressed. I haven't said a thing but I've felt all these things. And damn, when I heard you tell me just now about all your adventures, how you had all these near-death experiences and only just escaped being shot and being knifed, I just got so... I don't know how to say it, Orli-mate. I'm just completely overwhelmed here."
"Are you on drugs, Johnny?"
"On what? I just wanna hold you in my arms, Orli! Can I hold you in my arms just once? Is that too much to ask? Am I so disgusting to you that you can't even touch me?"
Orli shrugged. "Sure you can do that. Here."
Orli held out his arms and Johnny thrust himself into them. He flung his own arms around Orli's back and dug his chin into Orli's shirt, while Orli's shirt buttons were doing their own digging into Johnny's chins and leaving small circular marks in the chin skin.
Orli tried to keep his balance by putting one hand against the wall and the other on the carpet.
He waited for about a minute, then he disentangled himself from Johnny.
"Are you sure you're not on drugs, man?" Orli asked.
"Actually, well, I was in such a state over coming over here, and then I was in such a state after chucking condiments all over your floor,that yeah, I did..." Johnny extracted a handful of colourful pills from his trouser pocket. "Here, have one yourself."
And then a very strange thing happened.
The first strange thing was that Orli took the proffered pill, a capsule-shaped, shiny, pink bullet of a pill, popped it into his mouth and swallowed it. Without hesitation. Without asking for a description of side-effects. Without worrying about the possible reactions against or with or through the hormonal consequences of the wrongly prescribed medication on his own body, mind and soul.
Because react the shiny pill did. Oh yes.
And that was the second strange thing to occur. Orli felt it at once. A surge through his cardio-vascular system. A thrill in the ventricles of his heart. A shock down the length of his spinal column. And a thousand neural sparks all throughout the coils and spirals of his brain.
"Oh," Orli said and stared at Johnny with widening eyes. "Oh, fucking shit."
He stared at Johnny some more and suddenly he had this odd, convulsive sensation in the centre of his abdomen. He'd never had an odd, convulsive sensation there before. In fact, Orli couldn't remember ever having had an odd, convulsive sensation anywhere in his body before. It was odd, it was convulsive, it was painful and confusing and strange.
Suddenly, Orli had no clue anymore as to what exactly he felt about Johnny or how precisely he wanted to react to Johnny's presence on his floor in his flat, practically in his arms.
Did he think Johnny was just a friend and colleague? Did he feel absolutely nothing when being hugged by Johnny? Did he find Johnny disgusting? Did he find Johnny strangely attractive? Did Johnny somehow remind him of Viggo? Was there a stirring in his guts at the thought that Viggo was on his way over here, and that Dom was on his way over to the station, and that some strange women had taped him and Dom, and that there was a wart on his penis that was even now possibly mutating into something unimaginable?
"Oh my fuck," Orli said.
Johnny took this as a cue for another embrace, and this time Orli did not resist.
'How interesting,' Orli thought as his head hit the carpet with a dull thud and Johnny's weight hit his torso and Johnny's tongue wormed its way in between Orli's lips. 'How absolutely fascinating.'
-----
TBC
27 June 2003
SERIES: Nr. 10 of the Boring!Orli storyverse. Nr 9 is here.
Author: Lobelia; lobelia40@yahoo.com
Pairing: Orlando Bloom
Warning: The unboring of boring!Orli.
Summary: But is it permanent?
A/N: This installment is for
natasha1805 for hanging on in there and for forging ahead and for never being boring.-----
Orli stepped over the black-and-white landscape of salt on the cork tiles of his kitchen floor, the sand plains of gritty grains, the deltas and rivulets of Johnny's sweat leaf-textured into the expanse of granules, the smudged handprints and spray of stray chloridical molecules extending into the hallway and along the flight path of Johnny's recent exit.
In the living room, Orli picked up the phone.
"Hello?"
"Hi, Orlando, it's Viggo here. I'm at the airport."
"Oh dear," said Orli. "I'm so sorry. I completely forgot."
"You forgot?"
"I am really so sorry. I meant to leave a message with you but I couldn't pick you up today because I had the gas man coming. And I had some dealings with the police which got me distracted. Also, Johnny was here."
"Johnny?"
"Yes, Johnny Depp. Actually, he was behaving in a very extreme way. I'll tell you about it. Can you get a taxi here?"
"Sure. Sure I can. See you in a bit."
Orli hung up. He picked up the receiver again to check for any voicemail messages. "You have four messages."
"Oh, hi, Orli. Not there, are you? If you're there, pick up. Hello? Orli? Anyway, it's Dom. The police just rang. They want us to go over there, to the station, you know the one on the corner of Huston and Problem, we were there the other day, you know when that woman came by with the tape. Anyway, what was I saying? Oh yes, they have some new lead or clue or something and want us to go over there. They'll probably ring you in a minute, too. Also, I bought a new record. It's totally cool, it's an old 45 rpm, the first recording, the pre-release one. It's 'Pterodactyl Shoeshine' by The Shag, the 1973 version. I got it in the original sleeve, too, only a tiny bit scuffed and some water damage on the top right hand corner, otherwise mint condition. Hang on, I'll put it on and you can listen to it..." Rustle, shuffle, ping, pong, peng, muffle, hiss, rustle, crinkle, crisple. "I am sorry. This message has now exceeded the allotted message storage time. Beeeep."
"Good afternoon, Mr Bloom. This is Inspector Sergeant Detroit. We met the other day. I'm afraid we'll need you to come down to the station again this afternoon. There have been new developments. Please be there as soon as you can."
"This is Person-to-Person Delivery Service. It's about the delivery you're expecting this afternoon, Mr... er... Floom. It's going to be about seven hours late. Please ring the office if you have any other queries."
"This is Jacksonpete Medical Practice. I'm afraid there's been a mistake. Dr Craigmarton handed you the wrong prescription when you were in here the other day. You were given the vaginal anti-fungal cream. Please contact the surgery as a matter of urgency and discontinue the medicine at once. The ointment you were given may have confusing hormonal consequences."
Thump, thump, thump.
Orli frowned. His electronic organiser was next-door, on his bedside table. He put the phone in the crook of his chin, pulled a notepad (placed near the phone for just such an exigency) towards himself, slipped the pencil tucked into the notepad's spiral-bound spine out and scribbled on the top page of the pad: 'Police. Dom. Surgery, ring now. Delivery late. Viggo.'
Thump, thump, thump.
"Yes, just one minute!"
The person thumping on the door was Johnny. Orli nearly fell over him because as it turned out, Johnny was prone on the doormat, pressed flat against the bottom half of the paneling, thumping against the wood with his flat hands and against Orli's shins once the door had opened.
"Johnny."
"Oh, Orli-mate." Johnny crawled in and sat up against the hallway wall. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry I messed up your floor. I'll clean it all up. Just give me a rag or something. It's not your fault that I'm in this state. I must tell you... I should have told you this a long time ago but it's not just... a sudden thing, as you so wisely said. And it's not just a lust thing, either, although it's that as well. Shit, I hardly know what I'm saying, I'm in a real mess here."
Orli knelt down next to Johnny.
"Orli-mate, you're so fucking... I'm sorry I said that about being repressed. It's me who's repressed, all these months I've been repressed. I haven't said a thing but I've felt all these things. And damn, when I heard you tell me just now about all your adventures, how you had all these near-death experiences and only just escaped being shot and being knifed, I just got so... I don't know how to say it, Orli-mate. I'm just completely overwhelmed here."
"Are you on drugs, Johnny?"
"On what? I just wanna hold you in my arms, Orli! Can I hold you in my arms just once? Is that too much to ask? Am I so disgusting to you that you can't even touch me?"
Orli shrugged. "Sure you can do that. Here."
Orli held out his arms and Johnny thrust himself into them. He flung his own arms around Orli's back and dug his chin into Orli's shirt, while Orli's shirt buttons were doing their own digging into Johnny's chins and leaving small circular marks in the chin skin.
Orli tried to keep his balance by putting one hand against the wall and the other on the carpet.
He waited for about a minute, then he disentangled himself from Johnny.
"Are you sure you're not on drugs, man?" Orli asked.
"Actually, well, I was in such a state over coming over here, and then I was in such a state after chucking condiments all over your floor,that yeah, I did..." Johnny extracted a handful of colourful pills from his trouser pocket. "Here, have one yourself."
And then a very strange thing happened.
The first strange thing was that Orli took the proffered pill, a capsule-shaped, shiny, pink bullet of a pill, popped it into his mouth and swallowed it. Without hesitation. Without asking for a description of side-effects. Without worrying about the possible reactions against or with or through the hormonal consequences of the wrongly prescribed medication on his own body, mind and soul.
Because react the shiny pill did. Oh yes.
And that was the second strange thing to occur. Orli felt it at once. A surge through his cardio-vascular system. A thrill in the ventricles of his heart. A shock down the length of his spinal column. And a thousand neural sparks all throughout the coils and spirals of his brain.
"Oh," Orli said and stared at Johnny with widening eyes. "Oh, fucking shit."
He stared at Johnny some more and suddenly he had this odd, convulsive sensation in the centre of his abdomen. He'd never had an odd, convulsive sensation there before. In fact, Orli couldn't remember ever having had an odd, convulsive sensation anywhere in his body before. It was odd, it was convulsive, it was painful and confusing and strange.
Suddenly, Orli had no clue anymore as to what exactly he felt about Johnny or how precisely he wanted to react to Johnny's presence on his floor in his flat, practically in his arms.
Did he think Johnny was just a friend and colleague? Did he feel absolutely nothing when being hugged by Johnny? Did he find Johnny disgusting? Did he find Johnny strangely attractive? Did Johnny somehow remind him of Viggo? Was there a stirring in his guts at the thought that Viggo was on his way over here, and that Dom was on his way over to the station, and that some strange women had taped him and Dom, and that there was a wart on his penis that was even now possibly mutating into something unimaginable?
"Oh my fuck," Orli said.
Johnny took this as a cue for another embrace, and this time Orli did not resist.
'How interesting,' Orli thought as his head hit the carpet with a dull thud and Johnny's weight hit his torso and Johnny's tongue wormed its way in between Orli's lips. 'How absolutely fascinating.'
-----
TBC
27 June 2003