procrastination disease
Sep. 28th, 2006 06:18 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lobelia321As my several postings of today indicate, I have used this day to procrastinate. And as a result I feel like shit. Because I have a tonne of stuff to do, to finish, and somehow I never seem to finish anything. My book's not finished, the book review that was due in December 2005 (sic) isn't finished, the article I have to revise isn't finished, none of the fics I'm currently not-writing is finished -- and I haven't even prepared my teaching today. All I managed to do was the shopping, and that just makes me feel like a domestic drudge and intellectual failure.
What do people do out there to finish stuff?
I have the feeling that this disease has been haunting me for years now, the not-finishing disease. Is there some deep-down psychological motivation behind it? Am I afraid that finishing something means death? Or am I afraid of the success that comes with finishing? I finished football fics in the summer, and they made me feel fantastic. I also finished a handful of SGA fics, and especially the experimental ones made me feel really proud. But I somehow can't use that as a model. Instead of saying, 'look, I finished those, and I'll finish these, too!', I say, 'I'm crap, look at these zillion of unfinished things, they will be millstones around my neck forever'.
What do people do out there to finish stuff?
I have the feeling that this disease has been haunting me for years now, the not-finishing disease. Is there some deep-down psychological motivation behind it? Am I afraid that finishing something means death? Or am I afraid of the success that comes with finishing? I finished football fics in the summer, and they made me feel fantastic. I also finished a handful of SGA fics, and especially the experimental ones made me feel really proud. But I somehow can't use that as a model. Instead of saying, 'look, I finished those, and I'll finish these, too!', I say, 'I'm crap, look at these zillion of unfinished things, they will be millstones around my neck forever'.