Christian/Olli -- are they for real?

I just saw Jo and Thore on the Giga interview.

jkkskfjkffjeurijkvmkmdsk%$@^&*dkjfkf

Das wär's dann wohl.

*dies laughing*

loveyouallwrong whom I may have heard of distantly before tonight but who is brilliant, I tell you BRILLIANT, has posted a pic story of the soap boys.

A sort of captioned fotoromanza of stills, part ep commentary, part awesome romp.

I hadn't realised that watching this stuff with the subtitles is possibly even more fabulous than without. It allows one truly to appreciate the awesomeness of the script and meditate upon the beauty of screen dialogue.

And arses. Definitely arses.

Also, it does throw up the million dollar question: How does Christian manage, despite all the weight lifting and track running and working out and boxing, to maintain his stubbornly pasty non-muscular torso????? It must tie in somehow with the Mysterious Oranges of Everlasting Life wot confer upon his youthful body a Supernatural Resistant Power to the body-moulding forces of weight lifting.

Banish the thought that Christian might develop abs or pecs. Theirs is a purely spiritual love!!

Last boyspam of the night, I sort of promise!

Just watched some more of the Giga interview on youtube here. Alas, as yet sans English subtitles. Or French, or Portuguese, or Cantonese subtitles! *makes pathetic attempt at critique of Anglo-linguistic imperialism before succumbing to the Power of Dag*

What Jo says about kissing Christian:
Das ist in dem Moment alles andere als erotisch und geil.
(That is everything but erotic and hot.)

Meaning, that what with the crew there and being told 'put your hand there' and doing take after take --

YEAH, RIGHT! Oh Jo, you are SO in denial!

*cackles somewhat hysterically*

Also, Thore?? How mesmerised is he with the camera operators? Yes! *airpunches* He is so sneaking into the loos at lunchtime with Udo, the charming cameraman, and Udo sidles up to him, side by side at the urinals, and murmurs, Das war 'ne echt geile Kuss-szene heute mit dir und Jo. (That was a really hot kissing scene today with you and Jo.) And Christian stares determinedly at the mirror but his grey silk-and-polyester scarf suddenly feels tight around his throat, and at any rate, the scarf's tassels are getting in the way of his peeing, and then, oh dear, he finds he can't pee any longer because he's getting an embarrassing penile condition, and Udo's eyes pop out of their sockets with lust, and then they're both late for take 78 of the blooper lust scenes.

How, people, how can one write serious fic about these people? I am trying, believe me. But even my talents of imagination fail me. These people and this show, they just write themselves.

But fuck, they are so bland, irl and in canon, that I just need to see them on their knees in front of each other and with their trousers down and with their hot bland hands all over each other and their groping tongues making inept attempts at passion and oranges rolling and flying and bananas whizzing and mating and god, Gregor / Andreas wandering in some more and ogling non-muscular flesh. And then Thore's nipples go hard again despite himself (because it's not at all erotic) (and yes, those as remain that are not yet sucked into the boy vortex: stiff nipples are canon in this show).

And then Thore will go hunting on the week-end and hear stags roar and watch wild boars mate and he'll get all hot and bothered on his hunting stand and he'll shoot a lot more than just his rifle.

These boys are like the ultimate projection screen!!! This insane fandom /canon/ whatever it is, is like the opposite of a huge world-building fandom like SGA or Harry Potter: there is no world. It's all like lotrips badfic: kitchens, bathrooms, and more kitchens.

And moving onto rps: in lotrips, the actors, though mostly woefully B-rate and somewhat prone to woodenness (although they never ever attained the beauty of the wood in Verbotene Liebe wot is a forest, a veritable forest of the purest unalloyed timber), had complex and angsty inner lives (Monaghan! Drug problem! Mortensen! Painter and poet manqué! Bloom! Driven by ambition and semi-crippled in an accident years ago! Shah! A midget! Urban! Condemned to creature features!). These boys? Inner lives? Well, I'm still looking for some with a magnifying glass.

*is helplessly obsessed*

I listened to Sia's 'Breathless' about 15 times today and every time I just saw that bedroom in my mind, that absurd set, and that swoonsome scene where soap trivia and wood attained the epic beauty of pure melodramatic slash.

ETA: Also, to an unprecedented degree (unprecedented for me, anyway) this fandom blurs the lines more than any other I know between fps and rps. I think this must be because of the paucity of canon material. We get a few minutes every few days and are starved for fodder! So we hoover up anything!