FIC: When the Cock Crowed (DM/OB) NC-17
Apr. 23rd, 2004 10:12 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lobelia321I went to lotr_rps, a yahoo list I haven't been to in ages, and all I found were wips! There was not a single quicky fic. So I wrote one myself.
FIC: When the Cock Crowed
Author: Lobelia
Category: Lunacy.
Rating: A lunatic NC-17.
Fandom: Lotr slash
Pairing: Dom/Orli/Cock
Summary: Dom's cock is big.
Warning: Yes.
Length: Short.
Disclaimers: This refers to some fictional characters called Dom Lamont and Orli Cunningham. It has nothing to do with rl actors. The cock, however, is real but no disrespect or copyright infringement is intended.
One morning Dom woke up and his cock had swollen to gigantic proportions. It was as big as the sausage pillow at the side of his bed.
Dom stared at his outsized cock. He shut his eyes. Then he opened them again. The cock was still there, and it was still there.
He shut his eyes. He opened them again.
No change. Cock. Big. Kafkaesque nightmare. Alice in Wonderland and your bottles of 'Drink Me', where are you when you're needed?
Dom shut his eyes again. But he could still feel the cock. Not only was it gynormous, like a hippopotamus shlong, but it was also stiff. It was as stiff as Dom's early-morning stiffies always were, except now it felt different.
It felt stiff. And it felt big. It felt engorged. It felt like the trunk of a bottle tree. His cock had elephantiasis, and Dom wasn't happy.
He reached out two tentative, blind fingers. The cock (impossible to think of it as 'his' cock, somehow) was smooth and hard. There was a vein at its side. It was a familiar vein, scarily familiar. It was eight times its normal size.
Dom couldn't wrap his hand around the cock. The girth of the cock was too large. He couldn't hide it under the blanket. The cock stuck up like the mast of a schooner. It was just as well he hadn't been wearing his pyjama bottoms; they would have been shredded by the might of the cock.
The toilet flushed. Orli came in.
"Look!" whined Dom. "Look what's happened!"
Orli whistled.
"Don't whistle! Do something!"
Orli laughed.
"And I don't mean laughing! Make it go away."
"Well, all right," said Orli.
Orli crouched on the bed. He flicked the cock with the nail of his right index finger. He cocked his head to study the cock. Then he stuck out an experimental tongue and gave the cock a lick.
The cock rocked.
"Whoa," said Orli.
Dom said nothing. His vision had gone a funny colour.
Orli licked the cock again. He put his hands around the cock's fat shaft. Orli had big brickies' hands; he couldn't reach all the way round, either, but his grasp was pretty firm and his span pretty wide. His hands were also very warm. Hot, in fact. And his mouth was hotter still.
Orli knelt up on his shins and tried to take the head of the cock into his mouth. He couldn't. It was too big, like the mushroom under Alice's caterpillar. But he opened his lips onto it and probed the slit, which was more like a cleft, with his cat's tongue.
Then he hugged the cock with both of his arms and rubbed himself up and down against its shaft.
Dom made a pained sound.
Orli rubbed more and more, and licked more and more, and then Dom came.
He came and he came and he came and he came and he came and he came.
His balls seemed to have grown, too, because there was an awful lot of cum in that orgasm.
It splashed all over Orli's front and into Orli's face and onto the bedclothes and everywhere. But Orli wasn't put off. He kept pumping and milking, and finally, he'd milked Dom dry and Dom's cock was back to normal.
"Whoa," Orli said again. "Protein explosion."
"My cock is so small," wailed Dom. "It doesn't even look like two inches in freezing water."
"Now don't start whining," said Orli. "After all I just did."
Then they got up and had breakfast. Orli had a soft-boiled chicken egg, and Dom had some rye toast with 'Utterly Butterly' and lo-cal peanut butter.
They didn't feel like cleaning up the sperm mess. They went to the beach instead.
-----
THE END
23 April 2004
FIC: When the Cock Crowed
Author: Lobelia
Category: Lunacy.
Rating: A lunatic NC-17.
Fandom: Lotr slash
Pairing: Dom/Orli/Cock
Summary: Dom's cock is big.
Warning: Yes.
Length: Short.
Disclaimers: This refers to some fictional characters called Dom Lamont and Orli Cunningham. It has nothing to do with rl actors. The cock, however, is real but no disrespect or copyright infringement is intended.
One morning Dom woke up and his cock had swollen to gigantic proportions. It was as big as the sausage pillow at the side of his bed.
Dom stared at his outsized cock. He shut his eyes. Then he opened them again. The cock was still there, and it was still there.
He shut his eyes. He opened them again.
No change. Cock. Big. Kafkaesque nightmare. Alice in Wonderland and your bottles of 'Drink Me', where are you when you're needed?
Dom shut his eyes again. But he could still feel the cock. Not only was it gynormous, like a hippopotamus shlong, but it was also stiff. It was as stiff as Dom's early-morning stiffies always were, except now it felt different.
It felt stiff. And it felt big. It felt engorged. It felt like the trunk of a bottle tree. His cock had elephantiasis, and Dom wasn't happy.
He reached out two tentative, blind fingers. The cock (impossible to think of it as 'his' cock, somehow) was smooth and hard. There was a vein at its side. It was a familiar vein, scarily familiar. It was eight times its normal size.
Dom couldn't wrap his hand around the cock. The girth of the cock was too large. He couldn't hide it under the blanket. The cock stuck up like the mast of a schooner. It was just as well he hadn't been wearing his pyjama bottoms; they would have been shredded by the might of the cock.
The toilet flushed. Orli came in.
"Look!" whined Dom. "Look what's happened!"
Orli whistled.
"Don't whistle! Do something!"
Orli laughed.
"And I don't mean laughing! Make it go away."
"Well, all right," said Orli.
Orli crouched on the bed. He flicked the cock with the nail of his right index finger. He cocked his head to study the cock. Then he stuck out an experimental tongue and gave the cock a lick.
The cock rocked.
"Whoa," said Orli.
Dom said nothing. His vision had gone a funny colour.
Orli licked the cock again. He put his hands around the cock's fat shaft. Orli had big brickies' hands; he couldn't reach all the way round, either, but his grasp was pretty firm and his span pretty wide. His hands were also very warm. Hot, in fact. And his mouth was hotter still.
Orli knelt up on his shins and tried to take the head of the cock into his mouth. He couldn't. It was too big, like the mushroom under Alice's caterpillar. But he opened his lips onto it and probed the slit, which was more like a cleft, with his cat's tongue.
Then he hugged the cock with both of his arms and rubbed himself up and down against its shaft.
Dom made a pained sound.
Orli rubbed more and more, and licked more and more, and then Dom came.
He came and he came and he came and he came and he came and he came.
His balls seemed to have grown, too, because there was an awful lot of cum in that orgasm.
It splashed all over Orli's front and into Orli's face and onto the bedclothes and everywhere. But Orli wasn't put off. He kept pumping and milking, and finally, he'd milked Dom dry and Dom's cock was back to normal.
"Whoa," Orli said again. "Protein explosion."
"My cock is so small," wailed Dom. "It doesn't even look like two inches in freezing water."
"Now don't start whining," said Orli. "After all I just did."
Then they got up and had breakfast. Orli had a soft-boiled chicken egg, and Dom had some rye toast with 'Utterly Butterly' and lo-cal peanut butter.
They didn't feel like cleaning up the sperm mess. They went to the beach instead.
-----
THE END
23 April 2004
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-23 10:31 pm (UTC)*goes to the beach instead*
(<3 and all that, you know)
(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-23 10:33 pm (UTC)Now, make some fanart for this fic! Buwaahaaha. (I don't mean that, god forbid!!!)
Re: oh, but i am an earnest young thing, and i aim to please!
Date: 2004-04-24 01:01 am (UTC)you sick fuck!!
(and I typoed that as suck!)
Re: oh, but i am an earnest young thing, and i aim to please!
Date: 2004-04-24 09:17 am (UTC)where're the tusks, ;p?
*looks at Orli*
He needs more curls, mmmm?
...:
Re: oh, but i am an earnest young thing, and i aim to please!
Date: 2004-04-24 10:06 am (UTC)Except it's too *flaccid*. Dom's cock is a Tower, I tell you, a Tower.
*bursts out laughing uncontrollably*
You are even completely insaner than this fic but let me squeeze you!
(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-23 10:36 pm (UTC)Only you, love...
(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-23 10:40 pm (UTC)When I saw all the wips on lotr rps I suddenly realised that I've been writing nothing but myself so suddenly I needed a quicky.
And it's relief from bloody HP. I think I am letting myself be psychologically intimidated by that fandom. How can I cure myself of that?
(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-23 10:52 pm (UTC)Write what you want to write, write the story you want to write, and stop paying attention to fanon-based characterizations. <3333
(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-24 10:00 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-23 10:40 pm (UTC)Right, this feedback thing is obviously not working... *goes to the beach instead*
I really loved this, laughed my ass off, best crack!fic ever. ;-)
(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-23 10:42 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-23 10:46 pm (UTC)*goes to the beach instead*
will infiltrate fandom in a matter of weeks.
(cannot cope, off to Mordor)
(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-24 10:01 am (UTC)Except that I've already had a bunny about what happens when they're at that bloody beach. Argh!
Thank you!!!
(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-23 10:49 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-24 10:02 am (UTC)You know, I actually did some mini-revising (!) there, going back and changing words to make the rubbing more erotic (as it were). So I'm ridiculously pleased.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-23 11:26 pm (UTC)don't abandon us for harry bloody potter!!! lotrips needs you!!
n.x :)
(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-24 10:04 am (UTC)*cackles*
But thank you!!
(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-24 01:03 am (UTC)I think Becca's fanart put me over.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
What's your crack dosage again? :)
(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-24 10:05 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-25 12:04 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-25 09:02 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-24 09:59 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-25 08:58 pm (UTC);-)
(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-25 09:20 pm (UTC)You are a genius of raving lunacy as usual, my dear.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-26 12:07 pm (UTC)Glad to note you are better. I, otoh, have done my back in and keep waking up every half hour at night from the pain. Bum.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-04-27 02:53 am (UTC)Oh dear. I hope it's better soon. If not, have the husband give you a proper massage
with sex.