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FICLET: "Coming Again"
SERIES: Nr. 17 of the Boring!Orli series. Back to nr. 16.

Author: Lobelia; lobelia40@yahoo.com
Pairing: Orlando Bloom / origchars.
Warning: Threesome lesbians. Sort of.

A/N: Happy birthday, dearest [livejournal.com profile] orlisbunny! This one's specially for you!

More A/N: Forgotten that this series even exists? Last update was, after all, 19 October 2003 (sic). Refresh your memories of the entire series (scroll down).

Final A/N: Orangina, you know who you are. *g*


-----

Twenty-four minutes later, Orli found himself in a dimly-lit room. There was a mirror on the ceiling. The lampshade on the bedside table was pink with purple tassels. The bed itself was circular and large enough for eighteen cocker spaniels and their pups.

It is true that it had been only twenty-four minutes since Orli first fell in with the professionals Orangina and Yellowette (twenty-six minutes, by the skewiff clock ticking away on the burgundy textured wallpaper) but it felt more like thirteen months and ten days. Perhaps it was the drugs coursing crazily through his bloodstream and sub-lunar hormonal system, that caused Orli's sense of time to expand and contract balloonishly. Perhaps it was the accumulation of events and adventures and coincidences, of happenstances and occurrences and incidents to give one pause.

Pause Orli did in his mad cavortings through life's intestines. Pause he now did on this amply-proportioned mattress, between these even more amply-proportioned ladies.

Orli was entirely naked. His hospital gown lay discarded on the lavender-shaded flokati rug.

Orli was entirely blissed out. His chest glistened with sweat. The nubs of his nipples had darkened and each individual pore stood to attention. The muscles of his belly contracted around his innie navel.

He moaned in ecstasy because he was having his clit licked by two professionals at the same time.

"I don't think we wanna share you just yet," Orangina had said and unbuttoned her corset.

"Never seen anythin' like it," Yellowette had said and unzipped her imitation-rubber mini-skirt.

"Never tasted anythin' like it," Orangina had murmured as she bent down for a closer inspection.

"Never smelled anythin' like it," Yellowette had mumbled as she buried her nose in the odours of groin.

Then they had stopped talking, and Orli had started moaning.

Incredible. This was precisely forty-five minutes and ten seconds after he'd had his last orgasm.

Women were amazing.

Orli never wanted to stop being one.

----

Meanwhile, back at the hospital:

Dom: "Wow, that was fast, I mean, I didn't even see him jump out of the bed, he was that quick. But it's a bummer, really, 'cos I really wanted him to hear this Washington Starplane track."

Johnny: "How can you be thinking of music at at a time like this? Oh, Orli-mate, Orli-mate! Come back to me!"

Viggo: "I am very concerned, doctor, very concerned. It's more than just the, er, genital mutation. It's his whole personality. It's completely changed. This is a very grave situation. I've missed my flight to Iceland because of this!"

Royal surgeon Brad Dourif, M.D., Ph.D., Dip.med., RPS/OOC-AU: "As I explained to all of you earlier, even without the operation, there is no cause for worry. The patient's labia will begin to fold in upon themselves within ten, twelve hours. This will initiate the engorgement of the clitoral gonads and the de-vectification of the inter-scrotal dermatoidal tissue, resulting in the restoration of full penile and testicular functions within around a day."

Viggo: "But it's not that I'm worried about! Don't you understand? It's his whole personality! He used to be, how shall I put this, kind of a boring man. And now?"

Brad Dourif: "I guarantee that there is nothing to worry about. In particular, please rest assured that there is absolutely no need for you to alert the authorities or to consider suing our hospital or, indeed, mary-sueing our nursing staff."

Nurse: "I should think not!"

Brad Dourif: "Everything is under control. Everything is just dandy."

Inspector Sergeant Detroit (bursting through the door with eight policemen in full combat gear): "Nobody move! We have a warrant for O. Bloom! Where is the suspect?"

Dr Craigmarton (bursting through the door, clutching a sheaf of computer print-outs): "I beg you, I implore you! It's not my fault that the wrong ointment was prescribed! Don't strike me off the medical register, I ask you on bended knee! I know how to fix the problem, I really do!"

Harry (ambling through the door, bearing a misshapen parcel): "Excuse me. I've got a delivery to make. A Mr Oblanco Gloom? There was a note on his door, saying he had to go to the hospital? Well, this is registered post and I can't go home until he's signed the form. I'm working overtime as it is."

-----

"Oh, oh," moaned Orli in a far-away bed.

"Hm," said Orangina and licked her Germanic lips.

"I wonder if it's fuckable?" said Yellowette and reached for her handbag.

-----

TBC
lobelia40@yahoo.com
28 November 2004

(no subject)

Date: 2004-11-29 12:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] prairiedaun.livejournal.com
Oh wow. It's madcap! Poor Orli, when/if he starts to change back...

(no subject)

Date: 2004-11-29 12:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lobelia321.livejournal.com
Hey! You're still with this series! Thanks so much for hanging round!

*beams*

(no subject)

Date: 2004-11-29 03:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pecos.livejournal.com
Hey...I STILL want to know when they're going tog et the right part for that cooker! I'm on pins and needles here!

(no subject)

Date: 2004-11-29 09:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lobelia321.livejournal.com
Oh, shit, that cooker! God, got to keep all those balls in the air...

*waves and grins*

(no subject)

Date: 2004-11-29 04:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] brightest-blue.livejournal.com
LUcky,lucky Orli! Hopefully, the change back won't come too quickly. And no, I hadn't forgotten about this series!

(no subject)

Date: 2004-11-29 09:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lobelia321.livejournal.com
Unfortunately, the countdown is on. Heh, lucky indeed: we're women already, though, we're lucky all the time. *gg*

(no subject)

Date: 2004-11-29 11:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] piran.livejournal.com
there is absolutely no need for you to alert the authorities or to consider suing our hospital or, indeed, mary-sueing our nursing staff.

indeed. mwah! :D

[livejournal.com profile] orlisbunny is a very lucky girl! and thank you, lobelia, for continuing with this wonderfully twisted series!

(no subject)

Date: 2004-11-29 12:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lobelia321.livejournal.com
Well, *coughs*, technically, I realised, it's not even a Mary-Sue. What is it called when you Sue someone else, not yourself?

Thanks so much for hanging in there!! *beams*

(no subject)

Date: 2004-11-29 11:35 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ios-pillow-book.livejournal.com
*coughsporfles* MWAHAHAHA!

Priceless! And oh, the hospital episode, forget ER! The pace quickens, the plot thickens and descends into utter madness. Mr. Oblanco Gloom ... *mwahahahas some more*

(no subject)

Date: 2004-11-29 12:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lobelia321.livejournal.com
You know it's you, don't you?? I scrolled back to chapter 16 and I found that thirteen months and ten days ago I promised that you could put in a cameo appearance of your choice.

Heh.

11111

(no subject)

Date: 2004-11-29 09:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ios-pillow-book.livejournal.com
Errrr ... there was this sneaking suspicion snaking around. Thirteen months and ten days ago? We can't thank [livejournal.com profile] orlisbunny enough for having birthday!

Wouldn't have thought that you actually take up this cameo idea, but whoa! - you may call me Io-Sue now ;-)

(no subject)

Date: 2004-11-29 10:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lobelia321.livejournal.com
Io-Sue!! *bursts out laughing* You have coined it, I will use this! I was just thinking what to call a Mary-Sue that isn't a Mary-Sue because it isn't oneself (because, of course, the Nurse is [livejournal.com profile] lazlet, hah) -- and I think Io-Sue is feb!!

(no subject)

Date: 2004-12-01 05:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ios-pillow-book.livejournal.com
WAAAAAAAAAAAH! The lovely with the knowing smile is the nurse?!?!

*scrolls back to read the last chapters again, while Io-Sue runs off to the hospital taking all cosy cushions with her*

(no subject)

Date: 2004-11-29 12:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lobelia321.livejournal.com
Oh. I just saw your icon.

Duh!!!!

*falls off chair*

(no subject)

Date: 2004-11-29 09:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ios-pillow-book.livejournal.com
Guess it's time for my cosy cushions again:



And just for the record, the icon pic was originally in no way related to fictional personae in completely fictional contexts. :-)

(no subject)

Date: 2004-11-29 10:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lobelia321.livejournal.com
It wasn't? Good Lord.

*reels from cushion overload*

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