day of horror

[lobelia321]

First of all, however:

SHINY SINK porn!!!

WARNING: Definitely not worksafe!!

In other news (everything seems to be in 'other' news these days): I just zapped my entire post and must now try to resurrect it from the palimpsest of my sieve-like brain.

I have just returned from a day of horror in the hellhole of East Anglia and at the hellhole of 'faculty day'. The hellhole was nightmarishly hellholeish, with little roundabouts all the way there and all the way in it, the inhabitants with a collective IQ of 0.3 and the signage system non-existent. Ditto the beauty of a) landscape and b) architectural features. The worst, though, the absolute pit bottom worst, was the 'day' itself and the 'presentations'. I will not, indeed I will not be able to stand, boring you with the details. I will only note that I practised yogic breathing throughout in order not to fall down screaming. Later, in the ladies' loo with three colleagues, I discovered that they, too, had been practising their yogic breathing -- it was that bad!!

Considering that I am supposedly working at a university, I can in all honesty say that this day was the most braindead, unintellectual and unstimulating day I have ever, ever, evah spent in my entire life. My brain is numbed!!

The bustling hub aka hh of Chelmsford itself is peopled with troglodytes sporting a combined IQ of 0.3, and utterly bereft in any beauty whatsoever, both as regards a) landscape and setting, and b) architectural features. *still reeling*

ETA Proof positive of brain attrition: I'm repeating things. 111

I did, however, manage to drag myself back in time for t'son's swimming lessons and did twenty lengths myself in as many minutes. Hah! *would punch air if arm weren't too sore from an excess of breaststroke*

And because of my lovely Christmas present, I am now able to listen to Just a minute while SHINING THE SINK in my kitchen and cooking etc. I want to marry Nick Parkinson! And Clement Freud.

This morning, on my 1 1/2 drive down the M11 and A130, I heard this astounding man on Radio Four. He spoke of the origins of our universe, born from a white hole, which is a black hole in a parallel universe. And our universe is only one of an infinite number of multiverses, and there are not 4 dimensions, but 11. Condensed version here. My ears nearly blew off as I gripped the steering wheel.

We cannot, apparently, fit through a wormhole because it is microscopically small, as claims Stephen Hawking. Ah well.

I've been trying to read a Harry/Draco fic but just can't make it past page one. Is this because my interest in fandom has waned to an alltime low? Or because the fic is written by a (shock, horror) man and it's just too gay? 'Gay' for me is 'research' for 'slash'. Research is what I do; it's not what I wallow in fic-wise.

Hm. *goes off to declutter living room because FlyLady said so*

*also tries to de-numbify brain*

Comments

[cathexys.livejournal.com]

i'm not sure if the uninspiring university or the sink depress me more :-)

[lobelia321.livejournal.com]

CATHEXYS!!!!!

I am shocked!

How can a shiny sink depress you more than an uninspiring university??? Goodness!!

*is shocked*

There is nothing worse than a thought-free zone. Nothing. It is really my personal hell. I'd rather live in squalor than have that. Well, I'd rather have a shiny sink than have that, *g*, but if I had to choose which, alas, I don't get to -- I'm stuck at the uninspiring place!!

But: I wrote the entire opening to my conference paper in my head today in the car.

111111111

It's as if I had to reassert brain-power after yesterday's trauma.

[cathexys.livejournal.com]

i think it's b/c the university has the potential for thought...the sink is just...a sink that's gonna get dirty again :-)

yes, i have serious issues with housework...in case you haven't guessed :-)

[lobelia321.livejournal.com]

Yes, but I find it more depressing that a university which, as you say, has the potential for thought or SHOULD have the potential for thought, turns into a thought-free zone than if a sink, which is (as you say) just some metal hole in your kitchen, if a sink should shine. The latter ... anyway, I'm getting myself into knots here and my office online timer just went off and frightened me so I've lost my train of thought. Upshot is we probably agree on this!

I don't have to guess that you have issues with housework, I know you do, *g*. I do, too! I told you that I went to therapy about it and it's to do with my mother and blah blah blah, endless blah. Which is precisely why this Flylady thing is so addictive for me! If housework were just a thing I didn't care about or just a thing I sort of did on the side, I wouldn't be clinging to the Flylady method as I do!

[brightest-blue.livejournal.com]

D'oh!

[lobelia321.livejournal.com]

*sn...*

[sheldrake.livejournal.com]

Great post!

That's, er... not your sink, is it? You haven't started taking porny sink pics and sending them in to the sinister Flylady?

Chelmsford is disgusting and should not be allowed. It ought to be razed to the ground, Larkin-style. Then the area should be planted with a dense, fast-growing forest, ringed round with barbed wire and guard dogs, and declared off limits to the all-comers for a minimum period of one thousand years. Then blown up and stamped on. And burnt.

Just a Minute is fab! So is the universe stuff, although entirely beyond my comprehension. My uncle's actually an expert in that sort of thing.

I'm using my icon that explains what would happen if we went into a black hole.

[lobelia321.livejournal.com]

My good, a person who knows Chelmsford! Yes,yes, raze it, raze it, raze it ALL, annihilate it!! Ahem. But god, there are some godawful towns out in the world, and Chelmsford is one of the worst evah I have ever been to.

I am molto impressed by the uncle who knows about strings and things. I am generally impressed by physicists, anyway, although I only ever understand 1/100th of what they say. As Einstein apparently said, they read the mind of God. I have been amazing t'sons with this theory of black and white holes. Possibly the first thing that we should shoot out through the wormhole into another multiverse is Chelmsford.

Ooh, ooh, another Just a Minute fan! And idiot that I am, I called the man Nick Parkinson where he's actually called Nick Parsons. I am repressing a Nick Parsons whom I knew when a schoolgirl.

And no, that is not my sink! Bwuahahah. The things you think of me! But do you know what I mean by sink porn??! Stepford style! (I mean: photos of your SHINY SINK, eh? I figured out the metaphoric meaning of 'shining the sink' 2 1/2 weeks ago, *GG*).

[childeproof.livejournal.com]

May I ask a dumb, and totally unrelated question?

How does one pronounce 'Beuys'? Call me bloody-minded, but I cannot go to an exhibition by someone whose name I can't pronounce.

Queries to various acquaintance have elicited about nine completely different pronunciations.

Viva the Shiny Sink!

[lobelia321.livejournal.com]

You pronounce it like Boys but with an unsounded 's', i.e. not 'boyz' but 'boyss'. If you want to be really correct, you should also shorten the 'oy' sound, i.e. not 'booyss' but 'boyss'. Short'n'sharp.

The diphthong 'oy' is spelled 'eu' in German. As in, e.g., 'neu' which means 'new' and is pronounced 'noy'.

Now discard all those different other responses!!!

[childeproof.livejournal.com]

Well, that was what I thought - I do speak German, but in a pidgin way, I read it better - but someone had me convinced that this was an oddly pronounced surname, which didn't obey the usual rules. I should have known. Or perhaps I've just been in England too long, dealing with 'Cholmondley' and 'Featherstonhaugh'etc ...

Thanks!

[lobelia321.livejournal.com]

*snorts* I call Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, Pittsborough, just to be facetious. *snorts again* English place names!!!!! I was talking to a colleague today who is from Wolverhampton, and I asked, what are the people called, Wolverhamptonians? And he said, no, they are Wolverunians. 1111 Did I remember that rightly??

[lobelia321.livejournal.com]

So, um, how is 'Featherstonhaugh' pronounced? *coughs*

Cholmondely I know! It's Chumley, isn't it?

[lobelia321.livejournal.com]

And Magdalene College in Cambridge is 'Maudlin', of course, and Gonville and Caius is 'Keys'. Oh, I say, tally-ho, jolly spiffing, top notch.

[childeproof.livejournal.com]

A friend of mine had quite a scam going when we were graduate students with clearly far too little to do, convincing tourists that Oriel, Oxford was pronounced 'Oll' - for all she knows they're still passing this piece of wisdom on in the American Midwest, along with Leicester not being Leechester etc.

Featherstonhaugh is pronounced 'Fanshawe', God knows why. (Hence that pair of male and female contemporary dance troupes the Cholmondleys and the Featherstonhaughs.)

And Belvoir is 'Beaver'.

*immature snort*

These gems of knowledge may be the only significant result of having studied with the Immensely Posh, besides a lifelong loathing of Alice bands on the over-eights.

The one I have no idea about is 'Buccleuch' - I think it's a duchy, or some other pointless feudal leftover, but the pronunciation is beyond me.

[lobelia321.livejournal.com]

Ooh, ooh, I knew Beaver/Belvoir! *hops up and down*

Ah, ye Englishe! So quaint.

[travelingcarrot.livejournal.com]

Hey, there are shitty places in any direction from London, believe me. And a frighteningly large number of the people responsible for the wonders of Radio 4 are from these parts, so careful what you wish for.

[lobelia321.livejournal.com]

Dilemma! Radio 4 or raze Chelmsford to the ground? Actually, I have a suspicion that the lovely Radio 4 people from Chelmsford (whoever they may be) do not continue to tarry in that town but have moved house to elsewhere.

I don't know, are you in Chelmsford yourself? What are its redeeming aspects? I found it utterly featureless during my one-day sojourn. Utterly.

[travelingcarrot.livejournal.com]

I'm not even sure that Chelmsford really counts as East Anglia. It comes into the category of "vague featureless towns sort of near London" for me. Essex "culture" rather than East Anglian.

Try Norwich, or Cambridge and tell me they have no redeeming features! Or drive round the Suffolk countryside, where sadly you can't pop in on John Peel any more, but I can show you where Libby Purves and Paul Heiney live - I would love to know where Stephen Fry's hideout in Norfolk is, but I don't.
Seriously, I'll get off my high horse in a minute, but judging East Anglia by a day in Chelmsford is like judging London by a day in Tower Hamlets.

[lobelia321.livejournal.com]

Sweetie, it ain't East Anglia wot I'm judging, it's purely and alonely Chelmsford. I have lived in East Anglia for over 15 years now and in that time, yes, I have discovered the odd redeeming feature or two. *gg*

[travelingcarrot.livejournal.com]

Oh, must be me misreading you then. I thought you were calling the whole area a hellhole... I mean, the town where I live now really does have a claim to the title, but it stands out among a lot of nice places.

You'll have to let me buy you an East Anglian beer sometime. I would offer Suffolk wine, but I've never actually dared try it.

[lobelia321.livejournal.com]

Oh, no, no, I assure you I would not dilute the hellholishness of Chelmsford by chucking it into a general East Anglia hole of hell. Chelmsford must stand quite by itself.

And alas, I don't drink beer. So much for being German. But thank you for the kind offer!