Wainthropp in Iraq, continued

[lobelia321]

These txts were written between 18 March and today. Re-reading them, I realise they are absolutely mad -- but not as mad as reality. In fact, some of them are already historical (i.e. written before war started) and remind me of strange lunacies that I had mercifully already forgotten (suppressed).

Click if you dare for the continued adventures of Geoffrey, Mr and Mrs W and assorted world leaders.

badgermonkey:
"Saddam, get up, you've to leave in t'next 48 hours!"

"Oh come on, Robert, let's just snuggle for 10 more minutes."

"But we have to get Geoff out of prison!"

lobelia321:
"I fear the only way we can avoid war now is to have a multilateral lustfest."

"O yes! O Tony!"

"Jacques!"

"Viens avec moi, George!"

"Gerhard!"

"Kofi!"

"Saddy-baby!"

badgermonkey:
"Tone, will you let me join in your touching show of world unity?"

"Too bad, Robin, it's only for people in t'government."

"How about me?"

"Jump in, Shorty!"

lobelia321:
"Dear Mr W, am being ravaged by rampant crims day + night but at least have my torch, blanket, tins + teddy so will be perfectly safe."

badgermonkey:
"Dear Geoff, glad life behind bars not so bad. All fine here; a bit noisy this a.m. but Saddy just made joke about t'earth moving! Kisses to GWB for fireworks."

lobelia321:
"There's a ring of fire around Baghdad, Sads!"

"Yes, Bob, courtesy of me. I'm going to set your ring on fire next!"

badgermonkey:
"George, I'm technically a prisoner of war, you're meant to treat me humanely!"

"What's that, Geoff, you want me to stop?"

"Oh no, be more inhumane!"

lobelia321:
"They're parading pows on CNN, Geoff, look."

"O no, it's Mr W!"

"But his face is blanked out."

"I'd know that bottom anywhere!"

badgermonkey:
"Y'see, G, they want to be liberated."

"I dunno, Mr B, it seems a bit fishy to me."

"Hold it there, young man, I've a bone to pick wi' you."

"Hetty! Why are you here?"

lobelia321:
Cue triumphant Star Wars score. Enter Hetty in full combat gear + stiffly sprayed coiffure, abseiling through skylight + wielding 5 megaton weedkiller gun.

badgermonkey:
"Geoff, put your pants on, I've come t'liberate you!"

"Yay! All I need is a flag to wave."

"Hold on, you guys, you mean that's how liberated people act? Damn."